Category Archives: Lyrics

YOUR SI (Repost)

To the tune of “UHF
by Weird Al Yankovic, who completed the soundtrack to the cult classic UHF 30 years ago today.

Put down your old-school textbook
Throw out your online Guide
Put away your jacket
There’s no need to go outside

Don’t you know that we control the horizontal
We control the vertical, too
We gonna make a sourcing leader out of you
That’s what we gonna do now

Make it your home-page
Don’t touch that dial
We got it all on Your SI!

Kick off your sneakers
Stick around for a while
We got it all on Your SI!

Don’t worry ’bout ISM
Forget about the glitz
Just resize the window
And kill your favorites
We got it all, we got it all,
we got it all on Your SI!

Disconnect the landline and leave the iPhone in the drawer
You better put away your paper
Prime time ain’t no time to weave
Time to go and make yourself a TV dinner
Press your face right up against the screen
We gonna tell you things you’ll wanna believe
If you know what I mean, now

Make it your home-page
Don’t touch that dial
We got it all on Your SI!

Kick off your sneakers
Stick around for a while
We got it all on Your SI!

Don’t worry ’bout ISM
Forget about the glitz
Just resize the window
And kill your favorites
We got it all, we got it all,
we got it all on Your SI!

UHF should be your Procurement cult classic.  It was the first movie to teach us what happens if we try to drink from the firehose, attend an expert class as a beginner, or don’t keep track of what is in the supplies closet. 😉

Twitter (Repost)

Originally posted eleven years ago today.  Nothing has changed.

To the tune of Strutter by KISS.

I know a thing or two about it
I know it’s only for the brief
It lets you send texts to the masses
As long as you can speak in tweets

Everybody says its looking good
But I know they’ve misunderstood
Twitter

It claims to be web 2 point zero
But I know its just web point one
You send a text and it says maybe, Nero
Then the next one causes Rome to burn

Everybody says its looking good
But I know they’ve misunderstood
Twitter

I know a thing or two about it
I know that it’s not for the wise
Spend your whole life speaking sound-bites
Like celebrities high as a kite

Everybody says its looking good
But I know they’ve misunderstood
Twitter
Twitter
Twitter

I am the very model of a modern Global Sourceror! (10 year anniversary)

The Global Sourceror’s Song


I am the very model of a modern Global Sourceror,
With information analytic, subjective, and objector,
I know the rights of charter, and I quote the rates historical
From Vancouver to Singapore, in order categorical;

I’m very well acquainted, too, with matters mathematical,
I understand equations, both the lin’r and quadratical,
About scenarios optimized, I’m teeming with a lot o’ news,
With many baseline costs for the choice of the blue ocean routes.

With many baseline costs for the choice of the blue ocean routes
With many baseline costs for the choice of the blue ocean routes
With many baseline costs for the choice of the blue ocean routes


I’m very good at direct and indirect spend analysis
I know the HTS codes of products electronicalculous
In short, in matters analytic, subjective, and objector
I am the very model of a modern global sourceror

In short, in matters analytic, subjective, and objector
He is the very model of a modern global sourceror


I know our mythic history, Free Markets and Markets B2E
I answer hard acrostics, I’ve a pretty taste for oddities
I quote in elegiacs all the crimes of the major analysts
In auctions I can floor peculiarities ridiculous

I can tell undoubted RFPs from RFQs from RFIs
I know the croaking chorus from the mouths of the vendor sales guys
Then I can hum a fugue of which I’ve heard the vendor’s pitch before
And whistle all the airs from that infernal nonsense we abhor

And whistle all the airs from that infernal nonsense we abhor
And whistle all the airs from that infernal nonsense we abhor
And whistle all the airs from that infernal nonsense we abhor


Then I can write a shipping bill in Babylonic cuneiform
And tell you ev’ry detail of Custom’s CBP import form
In short, in matters analytic, subjective, and objector
I am the very model of a modern global sourceror

In short, in matters analytic, subjective, and objector
He is the very model of a modern global sourceror


In fact, when I know what is meant by “Dutch Auction” and “Japanese”
When I can tell at sight a credit letter from a guarantee
When such affairs as sorties and surprises I’m more wary at
And when I know precisely what is meant by “commissariat”

When I have learnt what process has been made in modern procurement
When I know more of tactics than a novice in an internment
In short, when I’ve a smattering of arbitration strategy
You’ll say a better Global Sourcerer had never sat a gee

You’ll say a better Global Sourcerer had never sat a gee
You’ll say a better Global Sourcerer had never sat a gee
You’ll say a better Global Sourcerer had never sat a gee


For my global sourcing knowledge, though I’m plucky and adventury
Has only been brought down to the beginning of the century
But still, in matters analytic, subjective, and objector
I am the very model of a modern Global Sourceror

But still, in matters analytic, subjective, and objector
He is the very model of a modern Global Sourceror!

As posted ten years ago!

Dreamers …

We’re all dreamers on the yellow brick road
but on schemers the hand of fate has bestowed
wealth and power that’s the envy of kings
zero hour, the toll bell always rings

So we wait for the day to come
when expression can be free and clear
and debate will not be challenged
as transgression against the overseer

As we are dreamers, the keepers of hope
steadfast believers, we walk a tightrope
through fiction and fact, we balance the line
and hold our heads high for a better time

There once was a time when the jester was no fool
the ear of the king, he influenced the king’s rule
with his artistry, he would inspire a gentle hand
and his humbleness would leave no reprimand

and the architect, he knew the golden rule
strive for majesty, inspire and don’t befool
inspire all with awe, and growth will be obtained
as common minds will soar, for it is preordained

So we are dreamers, the keepers of hope
steadfast believers, we walk a tightrope
through fiction and fact, we balance the line
and hold our heads high for a better time

But the pharaohs of fallow now rule from the sand
since the dust of the desert now covers the land
they traded our passion for money and fame
and gave up our vision in their jealous game

We want to build up, while our leaders tear down
we want to share wealth, while our leaders shakedown
we want to inspire, but they make us digress
we aim for progress, but they want to regress

But we are dreamers, the keepers of hope
steadfast believers, we walk a tightrope
through fiction and fact, we balance the line
and hold our heads high for the better times

So we wait for the day, when we can unlock
our freedom to share, turn back the clock
bring back the republic, share in the vote
and all work together, to strike a new note

Will the age of machine enable the day
where we can move forward, dispatch the old ways
and share in the knowledge, engage in the art
and set free our spirit, in a new start

’cause we are dreamers, the keepers of hope
steadfast believers, we walk a tightrope
through fiction and fact, we balance the line
and hold our heads high for the better times

Maybe it will. Distributed Computing. Secure Identification. AI. Blockchain.

Welcome to the New World!
The New Community-Written AI-scored BlockChain Anthem
by Taryn Southern