Category Archives: Lyrics

The Coupa Factory … Reboot!

In Honour of Coupa’s Recent IPO …

Oompa Loompa Doom-pa-dee-do
We’re still building great product for you!
Oompa Loompa Doom-pa-dah-dee
Humble is hard when your work is marquis

What do you get when you go enterprise?
Encroaching upon the ERP course?
Where they are going terribly flat!
What do you think will come of that?

I don’t like the look of it

Oompa Loompa Doom-pa-dee-dar
If you are willing, you will go far
You will live in happiness too
Like the Oompa Loompa Doom-pa-dee-do

Oompa Loompa Doom-pa-dee-do
We have a great product for you
Oompa Loompa Doom-pa-dee-dee
Humble is hard when your work is marquis

ERP’s fine when your systems are old
They store all your data on drives that are cold
When you need real-time you’re hung out to dry
To watch the vultures circ’ling high

Up in the dark’ning skies

Oompa Loompa doom-pa-dee-dar
But now there’s Coupa, you can go far
You will buy in happiness too
Like the Oompa-Loompa doom-pa-dee-do

Oompa Loompa Doom-pa-dee-do
I have a great product for you
Oompa Loompa Doom-pa-dee-derd
If you are wise, you will heed our word

Ask who they’ll blame when your spend is off track?
Deep in the red and there’s no turning back
Contracts alone are never enough
If your software’s not up to snuff

And doesn’t track your stuff

Oompa Loompa doom-pa-dee-dar
But now there’s Coupa, you can go far
You will buy in happiness too
Like the Oompa-Loompa doom-pa-dee-do

Oompa Loompa Doom-pa-dee-do
I have a great product for you
Oompa Loompa Doom-pa-dee-dise
If you are wise, you’ll buy enterprise

Requisitions with a single mouse click
Budget checks integrated and quick
One click receipts when the order arrives
Invoice matching that always jives

You’ll have no … you’ll have no … you’ll have no regrets

Oompa Loompa doom-pa-dee-dar
But now there’s Coupa, you can go far
You will buy in happiness too
Like the Oompa-Loompa doom-pa-dee-do

The Tower of Spend (Repost)

This post originally ran nine years ago. But for many, the situation hasn’t changed. So we will lament their plight until they are granted the budget and platforms to enter the modern age.

Well my wits are gone and my hair is grey
I spend in categories where I used to save
And I’m crazy for help, but I’m here getting none
I’m just shuffling papers every day
Oh in the tower of spend

I said to Ignacio Lopez: how bad does it get
Ignacio Lopez hasn’t answered yet
But I hear him pacing all night long
A hundred floors above me
In the tower of spend

I was made for this, I could not sway
I felt that purchasing would show me the way
Out of corporate drudgery to the beyond
But they stuck me in the dungeon
In the tower of spend

So you can stick your little pins in that voodoo doll
Because it looks like I’m going to be nailed to the wall
There’s no light from the window when it should be strong
A total lack of visibility
In the tower of spend

Now you can say that I’ve grown bitter, but of this you can be sure
If I can not track my spend I’m going to end up poor
There’s a mighty judgement coming, and I sure hope I’m wrong
You see, I’m drowning in paperwork
In the tower of spend

I see you standing on the other side
I don’t know how the chasm got so wide
We were the same, way back when
And all the bridges are burning that I might have crossed
Still I feel so close to everything that I lost
Don’t want to lose it again

Now I bid you farewell, I don’t know when I’ll be back
They’re moving me tomorrow even further down the track
You won’t be hearing from me again, after I am gone
I’ll be drowning in the darkness
From a dungeon in the tower of spend

Yeah my wits are gone and my hair is grey
I spend in categories where I used to save
And I’m crazy for help, but I’m here getting none
I’m just shuffling papers every day
Oh in the tower of spend

Gettin’ Sigi With It

Those of you joining the doctor at Emirates Stadium today at the Trade Extensions European Practitioners Conference on Managing the Future will know that today is the day we all Get Sigi with it!

Gettin’ Sigi With It!
To the tune of Gettin’ Jiggy With It.

Bring it.
Whoo!
Unh, unh, unh, unh
Hoo cah cah
Hah hah, hah hah

Bicka bicka bow bow bow,
Bicka bow bow bump bump
What, what, what, what
Hah hah hah hah
Unh,

On your mark ready set let’s go
Sourcing pro I know you know
They went psycho when his new book hit
Just can’t sit
Gotta get Sigi wit’ it

Ooh that’s it
Now Procurement pro come nigh
Sourcing Mojo all up in my eye
You gotta new ride with alotta stuff in it
Give it to your friend let’s spin

Everybody lookin’ at him
Glancin’ the kid
Wishin’ they was dancin’ a jig
Here with that handsome kid
Ciga-cigar right from Cuba-Cuba
He just bite it
It’s for the look he don’t light it

IGsay the an-may on the rand-gay and-stay
List’nin’ to Sigi make it feel like foreplay
Yo his cred-dee-o is Infinite
Ha ha
Big Sigi style’s all in it
Gettin’ Sigi Wit It

Na na na na na na na nana
Na na na na nana
Gettin’ Sigi wit it

What you wanna tread with the kid
Watch your step you might fall
Trying to do what he did
Sourcer-unh sourcer-unh sourcer come closer
In the middle of the room with the rub-a-dub, unh

No love for the cynics, the cynics
Mad cause he bled savings from the bankers
See him on the fifty yard line with the traders
Met Stamper, he told him he’s the greatest

We got the fever for the flavor of a crowd pleaser
Blogger spin another
From the Mojo prince
His highness
His mad skillz bring you riches

South to the west to the east to the north
Take his plans and watch ‘em go off a go off
Ah yes yes y’all ya don’t stop
In the winter or the (summertime)
He makes it hot
Gettin’ Sigi wit ‘it

Na na na na na na na nana
Na na na na nana
Gettin’ Sigi wit it

Guaranteed savings if you need a lift
Who’s the kid in the mist
Who else Sigi Osagie
Livin’ that life some consider a myth

Save from South A. to the UK
Finance used to tease him
Give it to him now nice and easy
Since he moved up like George and Wheezy

Save to the maximum I be askin’ ‘em
Would you like to bounce with the brother that’s platinum
Never see Sig attackin’ ‘em
Rather play ball with Locke and um,
Flatten ‘em
Psyche
Kiddin’

You thought he skim’d a schill
But he didn’t
Trust the blogger in your life, he hittin’
Hittin’ hard a piledriver with a ribbon
Crib for his bros on the outskirts of Surrey
Savings troupe for you and me
Don’t be waylaid
Go get Sigi wit it

Na na na na na na na nana
Na na na na nana
Gettin’ Sigi wit it

Purchasing Blues (Repost)

Editor’s Note: This is a repost of “Summertime Blues”, which was originally posted on June 20, 2009.

Well, it’s time to raise a fuss
and it’s time to raise a holler
About diminishing returns
from the corporate dollar

I just heard from my boss
who governs me
If I don’t save the cash
he’s gonna fire me

Sometimes I wonder
What I’m gonna do
If there ain’t no cure
For the purchasing blues

My CFO he told me to
go beat on the supplier
That his margins must be high
while ours are under water

So I talked to the supplier
he said costs were elevated
He was losing all his money
at the rates we had created

Sometimes I wonder
What I’m gonna do
If there ain’t no cure
For the purchasing blues

So I found a consultant
told her about my problems
And she went and discovered that
the supplier was just stalling

Material costs were falling
and the exchange rate was fair
I had wasted all my time
just pulling out all my hair

Next time I have a problem
I’ll find me a solution
I’ll find a sourcing expert
and get my retribution

No more will I wonder
What I’m gonna do
I’ll find me a cure
For the purchasing blues

In Commemoration of the One Hundred and Thirtieth Anniversary

A wandering minstrel I -
A thing of shreds and patches
Of ballads, songs, and snatches
And dreamy lullaby
And dreamy lullaby

My catalogue is long,
Through every passion ranging,
And to your humours changing
I tune my supple song!
I tune my supple song!

Are you in sentimental mood?
I’ll sigh with you,
Oh, sorrow!
On market’s coldness do you brood?
I’ll do so, too
Oh, sorrow, sorrow!
I’ll charm your willing ears
With songs of buyers’ fears,
While sympathetic tears
My cheeks bedew!
Oh, sorrow, sorrow!

But if patriotic sentiment is wanted,
I’ve patriotic ballads cut and dried;
For where’er our buyer’s banner may be planted,
All other local banners are defied!

Our warriors, in serried ranks assembled,
Never quail – or they conceal it if they do
And I shouldn’t be surprised if nations trembled
Before the mighty troops, the troops of …