Yesterday, we indicated that, with the current state of affairs, the limited Somali economy, and few options for many Somali men of working age, that Somali piracy is likely to remain strong for quite some time. Today we present one view of what you might hear if the Somali pirates were asked to put their story to song. SI thinks it might go something like this:
The Somali Pirate Song
I used to be a fisherman, and I made a living fine
I had a little cutter boat, and trawled the tuna fine
Government fell and though we tried, our borders were soon lost
The trawlers came and took our fish and we were at a loss
I looked for every kind of job, the answer always no
“Hire you now?”, they’d always laugh, “its the war, you know?”
The government, they can’t get the country under thumb
And I don’t want to get shot next time I take a run
And since no one gives a damn about this Mycenaean
I’m gonna be a PIRATE on the Ocean Indi-ian
And it’s a heave-ho, hi-ho, comin’ down the coast
Stealin’ oil and iPhones and all the modern gold
It’s a ho-hey, hi-hey merchants bar yer doors
When you see the power boat fleets
on Africa’s eastern shores!
Well, you’d think the local shippers would know that I’m at large
But just the other day I found an unprotected barge
I snuck up right behind it and I caught them unawares
I boarded their ship, ransomed it, and then I stole all their wares
A port outside of Cairo ends a mighty canal
Captains leave with so much fear that their crews have no morale
Cause they know that Pirate Big Mouth’s waitin’ at the pass
I’ll take the bridge and knock them cold and sail off with their gas
And it’s a heave-ho, hi-ho, comin’ down the coast
Stealin’ oil and iPhones and all the modern gold
It’s a ho-hey, hi-hey merchants bar yer doors
When you see the power boat fleets
on Africa’s eastern shores!
The merchant navy chased me, they were always at my throat
They monitored the shoreline with their little cutter boats
But cutbacks were a’comin’, and the sailors lost their jobs
So now they sail with me, they’re the modern Salty Dogs
An AKM, a skull-and-bones and pleasant company
I never pay salary tax and screw the TFG (Screw ’em)
Sailin’ down to Cape Town, the terror of the seas
If you wanna reach the FTZ, you gotta get by me
Cause it’s a heave-ho, hi-ho, comin’ down the coast
Stealin’ oil and iPhones and all the modern gold
It’s a ho-hey, hi-hey merchants bar yer doors
When you see the power boat fleets
on Africa’s eastern shores!
Well, Pirate life’s appealing but you just don’t find it here,
I hear in Bangladesh there’s a band of buccaneers
They roam the Bay of Bengal from Yangon to Colombo
And you’re gonna lose your cargo if you have to pass their gunboats!
Well, winter is a’comin’ with cruise ships on the way
My pirate days are over once they take over the bay
I’ll be back in spring-time, but now I have to go
I hear there’s lots of plunderin’ off the coast of Mexico!
Cause it’s a heave-ho, hi-ho, comin’ down the coast
Stealin’ oil and iPhones and all the modern gold
It’s a ho-hey, hi-hey merchants bar yer doors
When you see the power boat fleets
on Africa’s eastern shores!
With apologies to The Arrogant Warms from this Last Nova Scotian Pirate.